“Submit to one another”

Paul says to the Ephesians, “My brothers and sisters, be subject to one another out of reverence for Christ.”

I know that this particular reading sparks controversy sometimes over how it describes how wives and husbands should act together. Despite this, I like this reading, especially for the above-mentioned passage. After all, the rest of the reading is just an in-depth explanation of how to give ourselves to each other; and Paul’s main point is that it MUST be mutual, to the glory of God.

When I think about it, how completely counter-cultural and revolutionary that line is right now! Submit!? You mean, let the other person have their way, an indefinite number of times? Unthinkable! We are so afraid that others will take advantage of us if they see us yielding… or that we will be seen as spineless if we don’t make sure that we make our position very clear and never give more than what our position describes and requires…

Being subject to each other is completely incompatible with a society that seeks its own advantage. It completely clashes with the mindset of appearing strong. It is in exact opposition to our mistrust of people’s intentions towards us. It just doesn’t work; you can’t give freely to people who will automatically take advantage of you, or worse, who will immediately think that you are taking advantage of them when you’re not.

But then, how will we break the cycle of power struggles unless we choose to disengage by giving ourselves completely, without counting the cost? Surely we might get hurt sometimes, but is it not the real way in which Love will be able to grow to its fullness? Isn’t that what we desire, and why we resist being taken advantage of in the first place? Because we are worth more than that! We are worth it, that someone would give themselves completely to us out of love for us (isn’t that what the Lord did first?)!

I may sound like societal ideas of power are taking over; but actually, that’s not true of much I observe around me. Many people sacrifice themselves for others…to their hurt…The child who gives away his last candy (this might probably happen tonight)… The doctor who spends those extra hours needed to care properly for his patient… The mother who cooks extra food for her neighbour…

Let us dare to be subject to one another!